day #7 November 9
(11/08/06)
It turned to face me as I stopped, and I was able to get a better look at it in the light. Its skin was a transluscent, glistening gray, only partly obscuring an array of countless sensors and wires beneath the surface. Its face was covered in a similar film, but thinner, allowing more of the inner workings to show. Bare strands of metal lined the face in place of muscles, and its eyes were glass globes fitted with camera-like apertures in place of pupils.
It looked at me, almost sadly, and asked, âam I no different from these creatures?â
âNo, youâre nothing like them. Theyâre beautiful works of art, but youâre alive. You can think.â
âAm I?â
âWell, yes. Youâre self-sufficient. You can move around and act of your own accord, and respond to external stimuli.â
âBut I canât reproduce. Isnât that the most basic requirement of life?â
âCertainly not. There exist a plenitude of sterile creatures in the world, either by accident or by design, that are definitely alive. Hybrids like donkeys will never reproduce, but theyâre alive. Worker ants canât reproduce, either, but they are alive as well.â
âBut they descended from other living things. I was created.â
âIsnât the fact that youâre asking me these questions proof enough? Youâre not clockwork. Youâre a completely self-contained, complex autonomous system no different from me. And youâre intelligent enough to question your own meaning.â
âIs that enough?â
âI donât know. I think it is. But I think this is a conclusion youâre going to have to come to on your own. I can help, but itâs ultimately up to you.â
When I awoke that day, I was almost disappointed with myself. I mean, seriously. What does it mean to be alive? What does it mean to be human? These were some of the most basic questions of sci-fi. They were cliché. Whyâd I have to go and waste my sleep time on such trivialities? Because it was important to me, obviously. These were important issues; just because theyâve been covered before in countless pulp stories doesnât mean theyâre not. And though Iâve pretty much made up my own mind about it, I am trying to create something that can think for itself. And if I do somehow succeed in creating a human-level intelligence, these questions are surely going to be important to it. And no amount of telling it, âoh, thatâs been done beforeâ is going to make it any less real.
That said, I didnât have any solution. It would have to be a problem I faced when I came to it. I had no idea what form the question might take, and no sense of... the personality of the robot to take into account in dealing with it.
I had the sense that the librarian at the library was getting sick of me, so I decided to head to the coffee shop after work instead. And, to be honest, it had been almost a week since Iâd gone and I was curious what Joseph was up to. He wasnât there when I arrived, so I sat down and started jotting down pseudo-code for a brain. When my first cup of coffee was starting to get cold, he showed up.
Looking a bit more haggard than usual, he said, âHi, Cadmilus.â
âHey, Joe. Have you been getting enough sleep?â
He laughed nervously, âHardly any. Is it really that obvious?â
âYeah, it is. Whatâs up?â
âI think Iâve hit on something. These guys, you know how their whole raison dâêtre is to achieve enlightenment or whatever by blotting out the conscious mind and allowing the dreaming mind to interact with the physical world, right? Sorta like sleepwalking.â
âYeah.â
âWell, based on what Iâve read, I think that the inverse might be possible, too.â
âThe inverse?â
âI think itâs possible for the physical body to enter the dream realm.â
âOkay, yeah. Youâre insane. You know Iâm a staunch materialist. This is nonsense.â
âNo, no. Thatâs fine. You donât have to think of it as literally entering another world. Think of it as... how can I put it? Itâs like lucid dreaming, except on steroids. Thatâs just your conscious mind controlling your dreams. This, youâd retain full control of your physical body and all your senses.â
âThat sounds a little more sensible. But Iâm still a bit confused. What exactly does that mean?â
âWell, itâs similar to what theyâre doing. Their perception of reality is altered by their subconscious, dreaming mind, and thatâs what dictates their behavior. So they still go about their daily business, but like theyâre in a dream. Because they /are/ dreaming. This would be the same, but you donât have to submit to your subconscious. Youâd be in complete control.â
âAlright, maybe youâre not insane, but I still think youâre crazy. And this is still worrying. It sounds like it could be dangerous.â
âI know, I know. I havenât tried anything yet; donât worry. If I do, I want to make sure I believe itâs safe before I attempt it. I want to make sure I can âturn it off,â as it were. But anyways, enough about me. Howâre you coming along?â
âI donât know... Iâm still a little worried. You donât look well. But alright. Itâs coming along well. The designâs solid enough that I think I can start building prototypes soon. The main hurdle is still the central nervous system â especially the brain.â
âCool.â
âAnd I had another dream about it, last night.â
âIâm not surprised. Tell me about it.â
So I told him about the garden, and the automatons that populated it. âAnd I saw the robot there, too. And I got a better look at it this time; I even got some ideas for the design from it. And it asked me if it was any different from the other creatures in the garden, and it asked me if it was alive.â
âAh, interesting. I donât suppose there was a single large tree in the center of the garden, was there?â
I couldnât remember if I saw one or not. I replied, âI donât know. There could have been. Why?â
âThe garden sounded like the garden of Eden. Which makes sense; the rulers you mentioned that had these sorts of gardens built often had them patterned after the garden of Eden. So what did you tell it?â
âI said it was. Heh, I said that it should be enough that it was like me.â
âIn your own image, as it were.â
âNot in so many words, but yeah.â
âWhatâs the robot going to look like?â
âWell, the design so far is purely functional, not aesthetic. Although I did think about what we were talking about before, and decided that it should be roughly human adult-sized. The skin is going to be slightly transparent, not opaque. That will make it a little easier to locate & rectify any subcutaneous problems that emerge.â
âMale or female?â
âSince itâs not going to need or have any reproductive organs, Iâm going to stay away from any sex-specific anatomy. So pretty much androgynous.â
âMakes sense. But sex (or perceived sex) is another thing that you shouldnât write off so quickly. Whether people perceive it as being âmaleâ or âfemaleâ will affect how they interact with it. It may well be that you donât want to bias peopleâs interactions one way or the other, but an undefined gender introduces its own set of problems.â
âCome on, as if I donât have enough to worry about. But it is something Iâll think about. I doubt Iâll end up assigning it a sex, in the end, though itâs not something I should blindly ignore.â
âRight. Especially because you have, not only other peopleâs perception of it to consider, but the fact that it will develop a self-image based partly on how people interact with it. Speaking of which, do you have any ideas on the design of the brain?â
âNot a whole lot yet, to be honest. The literature on the subject is really dense, and still thereâs a lot even the experts in the field donât understand. Which makes my task of understanding whatâs written on it all the more difficult. But I have decided I am most likely going to do most of the work in software.â
âProbably a good idea. Do you think thatâll affect the performance at all?â
âMaybe a little bit, but not enough to be a factor in the decision. The programmingâs going to be done on embedded, special-purpose chips, so it amounts to as if I was doing it in hardware.â
âAhh, good. Well, itâs getting sorta late. ... Okay, maybe not so late but I havenât slept much and Iâm exhausted. Keep me updated on how things are going.â
âSure thing. And hey, be careful with what youâre doing, okay?â
âI will.â
Modeling an adult human brain was far too much for me. I began, then, looking into embryology for guidance. If I could somehow grow the brain from simpler parts, my task would be easier. And I didnât want to replicate the anatomy of the brain itself, I wanted to replicate behavior. The closer I got to doing so, the closer the resultant anatomy should resemble human biology. Maybe. There was always the chance that Iâd hit on something structurally very different, but similar in function.
total 9092 words
that's 1575 words for the day. Not bad for a full work-day.
Of course, I should be at 13328.
I should probably go back & "fix" the day #s. Since it's actually the 8th, now.